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"I remain frozen where I lay as I wait for him to answer. "It has nothing to do with your mortality, but everything to do with me," he admitted, his eyes still never leaving mine. Those gray eyes of his pleaded with me, begged me, of forgiveness, but there was something else hidden there. I wanted to know what his secret is and discover the truth of his retreat. From the looks of it I could tell he wasn't going to tell me, not that easily, but I desperately needed to know.Getting on my knees to better level his eyes to mine, I take hold of his hand. He squeezes lightly looking down at our joined fingers. To me Shadow looked just as disgusted with himself as I'd ever seen him before. That had always been his thing since he became a part of my life. There were sides of him that he never let show or gave voice to unburdan. Part of me blamed myself for this while the other part of me said it wasn't. All of me just wanted to unleash whatever inner-prison he made for himself. But I never. I bought red drapes for my bedroom. And these were not just the red curtains for my windows, they were ruby red drapes for my four poster bed. So I would wake in the morning surrounded by red. I bought red lipstick, well that's not so different, but it was bright red. I always wore red earrings, had matching red nail polish; the face of my watch was a red dial. I even wore red panties. Red patterned bedspread, window frames painted red.”“I noticed that when I was sexually aroused, that my nipples were a brighter red, and my pussy tissues went from pink to red. That was the point where I started to have the need to have sex constantly. I don't know why but having my private parts red was a big turn-on, and when turned on I like sex even more. That's natural of course, but see, it was a vicious circle: turned-on - get red; get red at my erogenous zones - get more turned-on; get really turned-on - I had to have sex; have sex and my body glowed with Ruby red flesh. And then I.
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