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I convinced myself that it was just an illusion, something I had concocted in my own mind. But seeing him again, it felt as real as it had. I trembled in its wake. During our conversations I began to understand that he was also trying to move on, but the past was his warden. He was his own judge and jury, convicted for a life sentence. At one time, I had believed that I could free him, but I could not. He had willingly incarcerated himself and soon was the only thing he had to offer. For me, soon was too long to wait and way to painful. He continued to look me over. I could feel his eyes touching every curve of my face, slowly moving down caressing every inch of my body. He took a deep breath, finally breaking the silence, ‘Sometimes, I wish things had turned out differently between us. I rushed you and I was too impatient to wait any longer. I should have waited. It was something neither one of us was ready for’ There was such genuineness and honesty in his words. I struggled. Inside was my very non-descript 90’s model Ford pickup with door dings and a dent in the tail gate. In any road or city west of the Mississippi, it would look like a dozen other vehicles on the road and attract no attention at all. It was registered to a man who did not exist, paid for with cash, and parked along with a few important things I would need on my journey. The truck itself only needed to run for a few thousandmiles and I had made sure that the mechanic would take care of that. I gave it about a week before it was discovered. That was the first week I needed to get on my way to my disappearance. I quickly changed out of my suit and left it in a pile of junk in the corner except for the envelope from Sylvia and put on a pair of jeans and western shirt that I had bought at a thrift store in Missouri on my last trip there. The other bags appeared to be intact as I expected them to be. Then I fired up the engine and drove the truck up the ramp before stopping to lock the.
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