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Survivors guilt they called it, also with a happy helping of PTSD. I spent time trying to control my emotions and keep the memories away, but nothing worked. I've just accepted that they will come and go as they please, so that's how I live. I hope I haven't scared you away."She took my hands in hers, looked at me with those wonderful eyes and gave me a kiss. It wasn't a pitty kiss or a 'this might make you feel better' kiss, it was a passionate kiss. After the first few seconds the initial shock wore off and I kissed her back. When she finally broke the kiss she looked at me."Have you ever told that story before?" No, well.. not to anyone who wasn't trying to treat me. Carl doesn't even know what happened." So why tell me first?"It was a question I had expected. I guess after spilling about the incident, everything else would be easy."Because of how you look at me, it makes me feel comfortable and safe. I don't have to prove anything to you or act like a hero."She looked. Gwen and Duane weren't forgetting him, though. One night when Will got terribly snotty at the dinner table, Duane speared him with a venomous look and held it until Will sputtered into silence.When there wasn't even the sound of anybody breathing, Duane said, "Seems to me your education's been neglected, Will." Yeah? Figure you know somebody can teach me somethin'?"Duane nodded. He was real cool. "Yeah, I figure I do. Matter of fact, I think it's time I introduced you to him." You an' who else?"Ma bristled, but her voice was low and steady instead of being shrill, the way it used to be. "And me, young man." Huh? Who's the miracle man?"Duane gave him an evil grin. "Colonel Waters." Who the hell..." Runs a military school in Lawrence. I went through there. I think he'd enjoy having you as a guest for awhile." Inmate, you mean!" Will sounded abruptly alarmed."Tell you what, boy. I've been talking to the colonel this week. He says you sound like a fine, self-reliant young man. Ought to.
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