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We just never collided, really. I know in my heart that if I had been able to look deeply into her eyes in the first few days or taste of her lips just once, I would have done or given anything to keep her. As it was, she came to her senses long before I did and took steps to protect her self from my advances. I’m not sure and I guess I’ll never know for now she is cool and distant as she should be professionally to me. She is right, of course, but I don’t have to like it I just have to respect it. And I do. I would love to tell you more about her. I believe she is a wonderful person with tremendous spirit and determination. But because I respect her privacy I will not divulge any information about her except to say she is my junior by 6 years. I guess I need closure with her. She stopped responding to me and shutdown. I guess this is her defense mechanism and I have no idea if my assumptions are correct. I do believe they are, based on some conversations we had near the end. One. They had left a bra, with some white stockings and cotton panties witha design of little girls. I stripped down, viewing my slender, smoothand soft body in the mirror and marveling at how much of a girl Ireally must look like.After I dressed as best I could, slipping some tissues into the cups ofthe bra, I found myself looking at a pretty girl in the mirror, and Iannounced loudly to Wanda and Marilyn: "Ok, I'm ready." Oh my God," they both gushed giggling. They rushed up and hugged me,kissing me with glee."Now, don't you feel just like a girl?" Wanda asked."Yeah, I guess. It's kinda weird." Oh, you can be Julie," ventured Marilyn. "We can be three girlfriends."FiveI was scared stiff at first, thinking about venturing out in girlsclothes. I was so worried I'd be seen as a girl by any of the boys inthe neighborhood, and their harassing would get even more hurtful."Let's go downtown," Marilyn suggested. "We can walk around, stop for amalt or something."I nodded that would be a good idea,.
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