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The thought of you kept me over the pain.” Please stop crying. Please have worked. The thought of her made me want to die, disappear, never be found. I never wanted her to find me like that, opening my bedroom door and smell my horrendous odor and find me lying on the ground in my own blood. She was the reason I held off so long on trying harder for help. I knew she cared most about me; she was the one knocking at the door, calling me. She would be the one to see me at my worst. I would rather her never seen me again then to have seen me like that. I was selfish though. I wanted to live more than I wanted to protect her.“Please don’t cry. You’re everything to me, you saved me. I fell, it was my fault, I should have told someone, you can’t know the future.”The door opened and my parents walked in. Camryn tried her best to suck her tears back in and pulled off me.“I’m so sorry,” she said to my parents, “I’ll leave you alone.”“It’s not your fault;” my mom consoled her,. She'd been talking to my Aunt and I could tell she sounded sad. In a way that made me happy and gave me hope that maybe I could come home soon.Saturday night we all went out for pizza and the detente with my cousins continued. We even joked around with one another without anyone getting angry. It was actually nice. My Aunt seemed to be over the traumatic events of earlier in the week as well. She could actually look at me again. Sunday was church and chores and everything started over on Monday.This time after breakfast when Cassy asked if I wanted to come to the beach with them I said "Sure. Why not."This time I went up to my room and pulled on some bathing trunks and a tank top. When I went downstairs the girls were waiting for me, Cassy in an orange one piece with jeans shorts and flip flops. Tori had on her black bikini with jeans short overalls over it. They started to grab their bikes and then changed their minds deciding we would all walk together."Do you guys meet up with.
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