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"He cocked his head and waited."Women said you were his son. He's dead," I said, "your father. Broke his neck, fell on the back steps."The man leveled his shotgun at me."You kill him?" he asked with unblinking eyes.I shook my head. "He missed a step, cracked his head and died. Did he drink?" None a'your business," the son said, the gun unwavering."Just thought I'd tell you," I said, sticking my toe in the stirrup."Wait," he said, "I'll ride back with you." I waited and we rode back, him behind me, shotgun in his lap, without any more words.He looked down at his dead father when I rolled back the canvas, lifted his head, saw the redness on his forehead, cleared his throat and stood. "This here farm's mine now," he said. "mine and my brother's." How about the women?" I asked."Them too," he said, "the stupid bitches. Only good for one thing, both of 'em." He made a crude gesture with his fist and forearm. "Old man paid five pounds for the pair 'bout a year ago, after Ma died." How about. A moron.8. Foreplay is to sex as:A. An appetizer is to an entree.B. Primer is to paint.C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.9. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy.B. Is uptight and a waste of time.C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.Evaluating Results:If you answered A more than 7 times, check inside your pants to make sure you really ARE a man.If you answered B more than 7 times, check into therapy. You're a little confused.If you answered C more than 7 times, YOU DA MAN!ChucklesAn Elementary School Teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds,.
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