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However, that night also forced me to address my own jealous feelings and find a way to cope.My current coping mechanism is to embrace it fully. Yes, I get jealous. No that feeling won’t go away. But I will use it to my own choosing, hopefully creating some provocative writing from it instead of letting it consume me whole. I have imagined our trio in every possible way, you and her while I am left out, me fucking someone while she denies you again, me and my ex as you tear yourself down in your own lonely room. Admit the feelings and own them. Be the boss of them and never let them leave another scar.I will always tell you when I get hit on. Sometimes just out of my habit for honesty. Other times specifically to stir that green boiling pool in your mind. I mention dating, finding a boyfriend that I can be free and open to go and do things with in the daylight instead of our midnight, unseen passions. I don’t tell you these things to anger you or make you feel bad. I tell you because. SCORE!!!! Ferndale wins 7-0!!!! Everyone goes crazy!! We just beat our rivals in the last game in our season!!! Now we have to go and clean off. Now, I'm not the most physically fit person on the team. I'm 5' 10'' and 220 lbs. I may not be the worst physically fit, but far from the best. I'm 15, with a 6 1/2'' cock (hard) that's 3'' wide. I have bluish-greenish eyes and dirty blonde hair. Tanner, on the other hand, has a nice 7 1/2'' that I catch glimpses of when he's in the showers. I've never actually had the courage to get in the showers in my school, mostly because I was fat, but also because I know that I would get a raging hard-on just by being in there with a bunch of naked hunks. I, covered with mud, tried just to wipe most of it off with my jersey, and leave. But when my mom saw me, she told me that I'm going nowhere until I shower up. So I go back in and I find that Tanner was the only one left becasue he had to get his photo taken, and he had to talk.
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