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Huge numbers of jars were made by W.I. Members when the fruit was in season. William Blake’s hymn; Jerusalem has been adopted as the WI anthem and is usually sung at WI gatherings. In 1999 the ladies of the Rylstone branch decided to make a nude calendar for charity. Rylstone is a very rural part of Yorkshire – not the kind of place you associate with controversy. The ladies hoped to make a few hundred pounds for a charilty from their enterprise. The calendar sold all over the world in large numbers. The story was made into a film and a stage play. Recently it has been made into a musicalThe writer has a healthy respect for the Women’s Institute and in no way would wish to denigrate that fine organisation.The following is a tongue-in-cheek story inspired by The Calendar Girls:‘And now ladies, I will announce the results of the home made preserves contest: In third place was Mrs Patterson’s beetroot chutney. The second prize goes to Mrs Hamilton-Smythe with her celery and walnut. Tremendous!By the time I was done checking my voice mail and talking to Sergeant Castle, Kelly was through talking to her parents. She hung up and turned to me, smiling. “Okay, that was my parents. They said they were glad you were okay and wanted to know if they needed to come back, but I said you were fine, and they didn’t need to come home. Daddy said he’d have a lawyer call, but I told him to have him call me, since you were screening all your calls.”“Yeah, and it’s going to get worse! The department has released my name. Somebody is going to try and track me down.”“Anyway, he’s going to get a lawyer to call me, and then you can talk to him.”“Okay, but I don’t know how that’s going to help.”Kelly took my hand. “Grim, just talk to the lawyer. I don’t know either, but it won’t hurt you to talk to him. You can’t get into any more trouble, right?”“No, that seems to be sewed up tight.”“So, talk to him.” She stood up and took off her t-shirt. “Now, before we go over to your parents’.
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