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Yes, I agree the tale is a little far fetched, and the moral issues raised are complex, but don’t let that spoil your fun! If it does – stop reading: there is enough suffering in the world without punishing yourself! I would have thought that the plot line would have been used before. I searched at some length, but could not find one. Apologies to any author who has preempted me. This tale is the product of my own deranged imagination. It’s longish, but I’m taking the risk of not splitting it into parts but posting it whole. It’s in chapters for those who can’t stomach reading the whole thing in one sitting. All characters, including the narrator, and all companies are fictitious apart from Bill Bailey, comedian and musician, who is in my opinion a genius. Joseph Holt and his beer are also thankfully very real. All engaged in carnal activity are over eighteen years old, but not necessarily very wise. ***** CHAPTER ONE It might have been a mistake, but it wasn’t all my fault. I’ve. Eventually I was able to croak, "Water.".I didn't know it, but a crowd had gathered. One of the men took charge and, since Tiffany told him the same thing Madeline had told her - that I was a convicted sex offender who preyed on ten year old girls - he elected to supply water from a hose. Actually, while he didn't know it, that was probably the best thing he could have done for me. It got the stuff off me, for the most part, and diluted what was still there to the point that I could breathe again without feeling like I was taking in acid instead of air. Through it all, I kept rolling around and screaming. It wasn't very manly, but at that point I didn't care.Somebody else called the cops to come get the sex pervert who had attacked a girl on their street. I was sitting up when they arrived and put me in cuffs and stuffed me in the back seat of a cruiser. Somebody in the crowd had seen the badge dlipped on my belt while I was rolling around and told the cops about it. They took it, but.
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