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She was happy with everything the way it was. Truth be told, I was happy too. But dirty thoughts of my gorgeous wife with another man just wouldn't go away.I finally decided to tell her, one night when we were making love. Lindsey must have been able to tell that my mind was elsewhere and she asked me what I was thinking of. She thought I was thinking of someone else and got quite upset, so I decided to tell her the truth. When I told her that I was imagining her with another man, she took it quite well. At first she was quiet, but then she said that if that was what turned me on, then that was fine. However, I had to realize that while it was fine as a fantasy that was all it would ever be. I nodded my understanding, pretending that it was fine even while my heart sank.On our next holiday, in Cyprus I managed to talk Lindsey into going topless on the beach. Seeing her laid in full view of everybody on the beach, with her perfectly formed 34B breasts exposed drove me wild, but that. Don't 'honeybun' me. And no I don't want a snuggle. Look, can you just fuck off, apparently I'm contractually obliged to answer this sodding letter". Dear Big BuggerFour inches!!! Sorry but you're just going to have to give me a minute whilst I catch my breath. I've known pigs with bigger dicks, and theirs are all corkscrewy. Oh well. Nevermind. There really isn't much point in you going to meet Miss Jiggly Tits with that little Iggle Piggle, she is going to be seriously underwhelmed. But, don't worry, we've got a little time to whip that pocket rocket into shape. Now I'm sure you've seen those adverts for pills in porn mags that will turn your Iggle Piggle into some Godzilla type monster, but believe me, those won't work. What you need is an exercise regime to whip it into shape (not literally, obvs, I can't imagine what good whipping it is going to do). The first step, however, is to build up its core strength and that means working out with weights. The type you get with old.
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