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The same curiosity that got Emily stuck under her floorboards was overwhelming as she placed the largest set up to her neck, the chain hung down in front of her chest and she had to reach behind her head to match up the edges and slide the locking pin into place, the metal was cool and heavy against her skin and her imagination wandered back in time wondering what happened when the soldiers came through town clearing out the confederate sympathizers, did they arrest everyone? Even the women and drag them off in chains such as these?As her mind wandered she pulled the medium sized set from the box and placed them around her ankles, there was a little slack in the chain allowing her to stretch her feet out in front of her but not enough to move freely, the sensation of the restriction was a bit frightening, however her curiosity had the best of her and she didn't think about the consequences of continuing her exploration, sliding two more locking pins into place she was too caught up in. "How much do you hate it?" Mary asked."Not enough to tell him to take a hike. When... if he comes back to me, I'll move into his arms and hold him close. I love him, dammit. Sometimes I wish I didn't. And I'm holding back. He doesn't have all of me, and each time he leaves, when he returns, I give him less of me than he had before. He knows this. He knows I'm pulling away from him. I can see it in his eyes — the hurt, I mean. I'm hurting him, but I can't stop it. Hurting him is the last thing I want to do, but I must protect myself because..." The tears welling in her eyes overflowed and streaked her cheeks. "Because someday he won't come back. If that happens and I've given him all that I am, I won't survive the grief. I'm holding back to survive, and that feels so selfish of me." Surviving isn't being selfish, Grace," I said."Sure it is," Agnes said. "But there's nothing wrong with being selfish to survive. Make sure you protect yourself, sweetie."Grace brushed the tears from her.
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