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(What have I become?)Second, my marriage was essentially listless. Oh, I loved my husband, but I never realized how much sex could spice up a marriage, until my son showed me.Third, due to my suspicious nature, I'd always have doubts about any future suitors, with respect to my dowager status.Letting my son, Nick, father a child by me and becoming a family was beginning to make sense to me, once I got past the taboo.Okay. I've talked myself into it. I'm going to leave my pills out in the open, on my dresser, and let my son replace them with aspirin, not that it matters now; I'm just gonna throw one down the toilet, each day.So now, I must give Nick a lesson in basic women's sexual reproduction. How could he NOT know about periods, at his age?A week later, after my discharging had stopped, I told Nick that this meant I was 'spared' an unwanted pregnancy that he tried to foist upon me.He seemed shocked that I was being so clinical with him, saying, "Yeah, I KNOW, alright?"I started. My hope is that he will realize that he has pushed me too far with his increasingly abusive treatment towards me and towards others. I am hoping for the sake of our marriage that this is rock-bottom for him and that he agrees to get help.” “But you’re a shrink – sorry-- psychologist. Can’t you help him?” “I’m afraid not. He needs to reach out for help and not from me because I am too close. What I need to do insofar as John is concerned is to maintain a loving detachment as they say in AL Anon groups. That’s why I let him stagger off to that pub last night. If I lift him out of the gutter, it simply reinforces his addictive behaviors because I will be enabling him to live as an asshole. These are lessons that I learned in training but I actually had to live it before truly learning the helplessness of it all.” “Jesus, Kat, I am truly sorry for what you are going through.” “Thanks, but as they say, ‘It ain’t all bad.’ Without John’s, err problem, I wouldn’t have met you and I am.
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