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Fred strummed a few chords, nodded to Vee, and we started.“You’ll never get to Heaven(Oh you’ll never get to Heaven)In an old Ford car(in an old Ford car)‘Cos an old Ford car(‘cos an old Ford car)Won’t get that far(won’t get that far)”“Oh you’ll never get to Heaven in an old Ford car,‘Cos an old Ford car won’t get that far,I ain’t gonna grieve ... my Lord no more”“Okay, Jon and Julie, the chorus now!”“I ain’t gonna grieve my Lord, I ain’t gonna grieve my Lord, I ain’t gonna grieve my Lord no more!”With Vee and Fred taking turns at starting each line, we went through many more verses; I can remember some of them still:“Oh you’ll never get to Heaven ... on a ping pong ball ‘Cos a ping pong ball ... is much too smallOh you’ll never get to Heaven ... in a baked bean tin, ‘Cos a baked bean tin’s ... got baked beans inOh you’ll never get to Heaven ... in a Jumbo Jet ‘Cos the Lord aint built ... no runways yetOh you’ll never get to Heaven ... in a rocking chair ‘Cos the Lord don’t want .... I glanced to the mirror, surrendering like a good pervert, trying to get a frontal view of her--I had never seen a real woman naked--and as I did, her eyes opened and met mine in the mirror.She pushed aside the wet strands of her hair and squealed a high- pitched "Ooh!" The door banged shut in my face.Oh shit."I'm sorry," I called weakly through the door, though I doubt she heard me over the radio. Feeling like an ass, I slunk to my room, closed the door, and threw myself on my bed. The radio's blaring ceased, and I was left alone with my thoughts and my guilty conscience.Guilty, yet I tried to think about what I had just seen, to remember the details of her beautiful body. It happened too fast. All I could do was wince and bury my head in my arms, like I do whenever I recall any extremely embarrassing situation. It was all the worse because I had always thought about how pretty Aunt Jennie was, and even fantasized about her, especially since she had been back from France.And she was.
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