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I quickly slipped on the clothes she had handed me, while she sprayed me with perfume. ‘You’re going a little over board Sammi, it’s just dinner. It’s not a date.’ I shook my head at her. She poked her tongue out at me and headed for the door, ‘You never know.’ Sammi bounded down the stairs and was already taking her seat at the table as I reached the bottom. I could hear her talking to the guests at the table. I saw him first before I looked over at Sammi and Mr. Mouth-watering, it took a moment to realise he was sitting at our dining table and I had to remind myself to breath. This had to be a mistake or maybe I had finally lost the plot, I tried to get Sammie’s attention but she was too busy laughing at whatever Mr. Mouth-watering had just said. I tried to act as normally as possible as I walked over to the table but I tripped over my own feet as usual my clumsiness is my downfall, luckily Sammi finally noticed I was downstairs and started with the introductions like nothing had. He was thumbing through one of his many books, seemingly unaware of my presence. I asked, ‘Are you the proprietor?’ ‘Forgive me, I didn’t hear the bell,’ the small man said, as he waddled toward me, ‘Old age you know, first go the eyes and then the hearing. Bartholomew Beetlesmith, proprietor and owner. How may I help you?’ ‘Well Mr. Beetlesmith, I’m not sure, but I’m always on the lookout for anything unique and out of the ordinary.’ Beetlesmith began rattling off various items he had in his possession: a first edition Tom Sawyer and Moby Dick signed by the respective authors, various late seventeenth century settees, numerous Grecian and Roman urns, Chinese vases, Italian tapestries, more books, early American colonial and Civil War muskets, bed warmers, swords, cameos, rings and bracelets, and on and on, ad infinitum. All of which I found to be of very little interest. I finally had to stop the antique roll-call, ‘I’m sorry Mr. Beetlesmith, but nothing is really striking my.
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